the past always comes back to haunt you..

im scared....and afraid....although i hide it pretty damn well i think...i realized that i really am deep down inside..hmm

about what you may ask..??


sooo many things....

FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!

kanack attack...

man im kanack attacking..im tired...

in my interview one question is what quality do you think is the best that you have?

i said patience..

now i must believe my own patience...

oh good lord..i am hanging out at my sister's place and am watching korean soaps for the first time....damn it's addicting..anyone seen "happiness" haha..it's rather good!!lol

i feel numb...sometimes i wish emotions wouldnt' get in the way...but unfortunately....i can't get everything i want..

i find some music video's pretty friggin dumb...i mean if i wanted to see these people faces over and over again singing the song...then i'd just look ath the inserts in te cd's while i listen to your song..geez..how bout tell a visual story in your music video..

note to women..

men have feelings too...dont forget that....sometimes even though we hide it...it's almost as much as you have..

The risk of Love

saw this on my friends myspace..thought it was rather true...



The Risk of Love

There is a risk involved in everything
Every time you share a smile
Every time you shed a tear
You are opening yourself up to hurt.

Some people tread slowly through life,
Avoiding the closeness risk brings,
Side-stepping the things they can't understand
Turning away from those who care too much,
Those who care stay too long,
Those who hold too tightly.

There is never an easy way to love
You can not approach it cautiously
It will not wait for you to arm yourself.
It does not care if you turn away
It is everywhere, it is everything.

Love is the greatest of all risks.
It is not reliable, it is not cautious,
It is not sympathetic
It is unprejudiced and unmerciliess.
It strikes the strongest of mind,
And brings them to their knees in one blow.

Even in the best of times, love hurts.
It hurts to need, it hurts to belong,
It hurts to be the other part of someone else,
Without either of your consent.
But, from the moment it overtakes you,
It hurts worse to be all alone.

The risk of love never depletes;
It grows stronger and more dangerous with time.
But, it's in the total surrender of all defense,
That we, no matter weak or strong,
No matter willing or captive,
No matter what, we truly experience love.

Despite the many things love is not,
Outweighing it all are the things that love is.
Love is surrender without a loss.
It is a gift without the cost.
It consumes your every thought & desire,
Every breath you take.
It is the fire that fuels you
To do more than pass through life;
It urges you, instead, to live.

No matter the outcome, having felt love,
You will never be the same.
It may scar your heart & soul
And Leave you only memories of forever.
Or, it may cause every day of your life
To feel like there is no need for tomorrow.
But, love is worth it. It is worth the risk...

For in all of life,
Love is truly the only risk worth taking.

i love translations..

i dont use this word...it's pretty derogatory..but lol..i couldn't resist...